By John Moltz
July 18, 2025 2:00 PM PT
This Week in Apple: The colors of money
The iPhone 17 colors are revealed, Apple buys American, and a rumormonger gets in hot water.
The ascent of orange papaya
Let’s meet the colors!
[Dating Game music]
“iPhone 17 colors confirmed! See all of Apple’s 2025 options right here”
First, it’s the long-time couple of the iPhone world and they’re back and can’t help but notice your cool vibe from across the bar, it’s Black and White! Ah, but who’s this handsome, mysterious stranger who surely runs his own detective agency?! Why, it’s Grey… Steel Gray.
Not all the colors are simply on the black to white spectrum, however. The iPhone 17 base models will reportedly come in actual shades of Green and Purple and, sigh, Light Blue. At least it’s a real light blue instead of the MacBook’s Sky Blue which is like someone whispered the word “blue” at you from across a room.
The iPhone Air also comes in a Light Blue but it’s a slightly lighter shade than the base phone because…
Apple reportedly wants less saturated colors for the iPhone 17 Air to reinforce the lightness of the device.
Yes, if you’re upset you can’t get real colors on your iPhone Air, just take solace in knowing that it’s only because English is a stupid language in which “light” applies to weights and colors, two things that have absolutely no connection to each other. I’m pretty sure if you weighed a bright purple iPhone Air and one in just a hint of champagne, Apple, they’d both weigh the same!
Speaking of which, the Air will also come in Light Gold which is how you’ll describe your financial situation after buying one.
The iPhone Pro line will come in Black, White, Gray, and Dark Blue, which is to say gray—it’s not a blue at all, it’s another gray. Two grays, they’re literally doing two grays. It’s ridiculous.
Surprisingly, however, the Pro will also come in Orange, the shade of which is more rightly called “Papaya”. So, Pro users will have one real color. That’s something.
Strong forces
This week Apple made a big deal about magnets.
“Apple Announces $500 Million Commitment to Buying American Magnets”
American magnets. This is important because magnets are in everything these days.
At $500 million this is more a big deal for magnets than it is for Apple, which makes that much in half a day.
The dirty business of Apple rumors
Finally, absolutely scandalous news in the Apple world this week as rumormonger Jon Prosser was caught on camera cuddling with an Apple employee’s phone running iOS 26 at a Coldplay concert.
I’m sorry, I’m getting my notes mixed up. I apologize.
This is ridiculous. This office is a mess.
Here we go.
“Apple Sues Jon Prosser Over iOS 26 Leaks”
The suit claims that Prosser and the friend of an Apple employee plotted to access the employee’s iPhone, which had an early version of iOS 26 running on it.
According to Apple, Prosser and Ramacciotti plotted to access Lipnik’s phone, acquiring his passcode and then using location-tracking to determine when he “would be gone for an extended period.” Prosser reportedly offered financial compensation to Ramacciotti in return for assisting with accessing the development iPhone.
You’ve gotta imagine that friendship is pretty much over.
Ramacciotti: “Heyyy, man, how’s it goin’? Wanna go see ‘Superman’?”
Lipnik: “Sure! Let me just order up some tickets on my iPhone… Ohhh, wait, my iPhone is being held as evidence.”
For his part, Prosser said on X, the go-to platform for fascist AIs and stern denials of wrongdoing, that he was unaware of the situation and:
I certainly did not “plot” to access anyone’s phone and was unaware of the situation playing out.
Plotting implies there was graph paper. There was no graph paper involved.
Personally, I wish Apple would make up its mind. First it says running to the press doesn’t solve anything but apparently having the press jack your stuff without your knowledge is also no good?! Which one is it, Apple?! It can’t be both!
As bad as this situation seems, maybe Prosser can take heart in knowing that there is nothing worse in the entire world than the three words “Coldplay kiss cam”.
[shudder]
[John Moltz is a Six Colors contributor. You can find him on Mastodon at Mastodon.social/@moltz and he sells items with references you might get on Cotton Bureau.]