By John Moltz
February 9, 2024 2:00 PM PT
This Week in Apple: Infinitim War
This week Apple sighs heavily every time you forget your password, YouTube puts the Vision Pro on its map, and Tim Cook gets all set for the snap.
This is why I use the same password for everything
Despite a fairly smooth launch for the Vision Pro, there were one or two signs that maybe not everything was completely ready on day one.
Shortly after the device’s introduction, reports indicated that customers who forgot their password were being required to go to an Apple Store in order to have it reset. It is unclear whether or not customers were led through the mall by a cleric ringing a bell and loudly declaring “SHAME! SHAME!” But, as a father who has many more times than once had to deal with resetting a device for a child who changed his password and promptly forgot it, I welcome this new stricter regime. It is high time we cracked down on these infractions and I hope this new practice spreads to other Apple devi-
“visionOS 1.1 beta lets users reset a Vision Pro if they forget their password”
Oh. Never mind.
Is there an app for that?
After early drama about YouTube and Netflix not being available on the Vision Pro on day one, there was some awkward coughing and maybe at least one of them has changed their mind.
“YouTube Claims an Apple Vision Pro App is On the Roadmap”
This may or may not have anything to do with the fact that the developer of the now-defunct Reddit reader Apollo has created a Vision Pro app for watching YouTube videos.
For its part, Plex has said that it’s not currently developing a dedicated app for the Vision Pro.
Great, now what am I going to use to immersively watch all these 720p rips I did of my DVD collection 15 years ago?
Plex probably doesn’t have the time to make a Vision Pro app because it’s too busy running away from its core business of being the go-to software for sharing ill-gotten media.
“Plex Launches Movie Rental Store”
Look, if I wanted to rent movies, I wouldn’t have a Plex account. Duh. Do you even hear yourself?
The Tim Cook Cinematic Universe
This week Apple teased the upcoming Apple Music Super Bowl Halftime Show (AMSBHS) featuring Usher, first with a short clip and then a 7-minute long skit featuring Ludacris, Lil Jon, and Taraji P. Henson being commanded by Apple CEO Tim Cook to find Usher, who has gone missing, in time for the big show.
In the long-standing tradition of the ads surrounding this uniquely American event, the skit is not terribly funny but it does include Ludacris delivering the line “Tim, I’m sorry, bro.” Which is, of course, a famous callback to what Scott Forstall said to Cook during the Maps fiasco.
If you are anything like me (older and out of touch), after seeing this ad you will laugh heartily and say to yourself “I have no idea what that was all about or who half these people are!”
Still, we are seeing a pattern here. After last year’s skit that placed Tim in a meeting with Mother Nature, it seems clear that Apple has created what amounts to a Cook Cinematic Universe (CCU) revolving around the award-eligible CEO.
Sadly, despite the small number of productions in the CCU, there are already signs that its quality is degrading. Perhaps people are simply tired of super Tim stories or maybe the productions just aren’t as good anymore. For example, the plot device of a missing key element for an event was already used in the September 2018 iPhone XS keynote event, which featured a missing presentation clicker.
And don’t get me started on “Secret Timvasion”. What a stinker.
What’s next, viewers are left to wonder? Lazy stories invoking such overused sci-fi tropes as Tim travel? Or a multimverse?
Actually, you know what? I would watch those.
[John Moltz is a Six Colors contributor. You can find him on Mastodon at Mastodon.social/@moltz and he sells items with references you might get on Cotton Bureau.]