By Dan Moren
April 30, 2016 12:24 PM PT
The Back Page: Apple events – the darker side
Word on the street is that Apple is finally ready to get into the original content game. To this, I say “Hallelujah!” Maybe some fear that we’re already approaching Peak TV and it’s too late for Apple to get into the business of producing its own shows, but I say that bringing the trademark Apple aesthetic to television is just more great news for all of us fans of serialized content.
Most of all, though, I’m happy that there’s now some space for me to make a few pitches that I’ve been saving up for just such an eventuality. So if you please, Apple, consider a few series that I think need to be included among the debut slate of shows for your original content:
You can’t have a network without a cop show of some variety—preferably with an odd-couple pairing. In this case it’s Detective Maggie Kravitz, a hard-bitten homicide cop with a dark past as the founder of a failed tech startup, whose latest case sees her investigating the murder of a ride-sharing driver. That brings her to the driver’s last passenger, app developer Katie Lee, who uses her knowledge of the sharing economy, network architecture, and, of course, emojis to help Kravitz solve crimes…and come to terms with her former life.
One Ouroboros Circle
Every network needs its flagship drama: its Breaking Bad or The Wire or Will & Grace. I’m thinking there’s an opportunity here to patch things up with Aaron Sorkin after the somewhat mixed-response to last year’s Steve Jobs. So here we go: a behind-the-scenes drama at a multi-billion-dollar technology company? There’s the affable, avuncular CEO who dispenses pearls of wisdom, his harried veteran deputy, the spunky and savvy head of public relations—ah, crap, that’s just The West Wing, isn’t it? Okay, well, let’s just have him revive that and call it even.
Life is Viral
A one-camera situation comedy about generational differences. Kim and Cal are teenage twins growing up with older parents who don’t know a Snapchat from an Instagram. But everything changes when mother Sarah’s private equity firm acquires faltering social network FriendSpace. Now the kids need to give mom a crash course in online life and find a way to make the site succeed again. (Note: With its in-depth discussions of venture capital, investing, and corporate management, this can double as educational programming.)
So Hero. Much Strong. Wow
After an overexposure to cat videos and animated GIFs, mild-mannered Gil Garson is transformed into the mighty superhero MemeMaster! Just as some other popular superhero that we’re not allowed to compare him to for legal reasons derives his power from Earth’s yellow sun, Garson draws his strength, speed, and ability fo fly from memes, enabling him to fight crime…as long as he can haz cheezburgers. And there’s plenty of crime to be fought, thanks to the cruel supervillain Epic Fail, who will not stop terrorizing Ermahgerd City until all of its base belongs to him.
Instant ratings. Would also accept Law & Order: Silicon Valley.
[Dan Moren is the East Coast Bureau Chief of Six Colors. You can find him on Mastodon at @email@example.com or reach him by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. His latest novel, the supernatural detective story All Souls Lost, is now available for pre-order.]